Yes, I really said this at dinner last night.
Yes, A really did have a fork dangerously close to J’s eye as they were farting around at the table.
And yes, it took my husband nearly snorting wine out his nose for me to realize just what the heck I had said.
edit: My memory is getting worse and worse. Apparently I actually said, “Get the fork away from him!” Which is even funnier. I hope Tom still loves me when the half-heimer’s becomes full-fledged Alzheimers.