where wildly different is perfectly normal
Relaxed shoes, relaxed brain
Relaxed shoes, relaxed brain

Relaxed shoes, relaxed brain

Do you own a pair of really comfy shoes? Like, ridiculously roomy and fit your tootsies like none other? Think Crocs or well-worn slippers. They’re loose, they’re relaxing, they’re just…comfy. And then you go ahead and put on a pair of dress shoes. Suddenly there’s support, there’s structure, there ain’t a lot of toe-wriggling. They fit, but they’re just not the same.

I’ve discovered that returning to work is just like this. My brain had eleven years of relaxed (snort…ok, relatively relaxed) comfort and grew accustomed to that. While I was busy, and oftentimes stressfully and painfully so, there was little structure. It could work and play, often in the same hour. Now my poor brain…I feel sorry for it. I’m making it concentrate for long periods of time with little break. I can’t let it go check a blog, peek at Twitter, or otherwise have a figurative smoke-break. My brain is thriving on the work, but it’s also shooting me dirty looks that can only be interpreted as “Mommmm!!!! Why are you making me doooo this??? This is haaaaard!!!” Evidently my brain is a whiny mcwhiner pants.

The first two days of work have gone well. The boys seem to be adjusting to the after school care well; A even found some peeps. No, really, he has found a handful of other 5th grade boys who are almost entirely just.like.him. One of them talks just like my complex son. Oh, and he’s in the district’s GT program. You know, the one A was denied. Hm…it really is all about output and test scores, ain’t it? I think Rosie the BassetBeagleCorgi is having the hardest time. I’m not around all day like I used to, and she’s indicating her displeasure in little piles around the house. That likely makes it official: I’m working to pay for child care and dog walking. ::facepalm:: But hey! My brain (when it’s not whining) is thriving!

So my brain is adjusting, the boys are adjusting, I refuse to adjust to commuting 40 minutes one way and live on a lovely houseboat on de river Denial. All is well.

I just kinda miss my old comfy shoes.

6 Comments

  1. Good that your brain is getting used for other things! I bet there’s satisfaction in that. (I haven’t yet gotten back those IQ points lost during pregnancy. Must be like the pregnancy increase in shoe size: You can never go back!)

    I have to crate my dogs when I go out. Otis (who passed last year) was a special needs dog who would “special needs” all over the place. Milo is a chewer when left unattended. I’ve found LOTS of not-his-stuff in his favorite chewing spot in the back yard. And in several of his not-favorite chewing spots. Daisy is a border collie mix and is just BUSY with everything. Whichever way you go to deal with doggie, I hope that “this, too, shall pass.”

  2. GinevraCat

    I’m so glad your brain is thriving – going back to official “work” after children is SCARY. I was only at home for 15 months with my first and it was hectic going back – next year, after 3 years at home and into a new career is going to be a tad… abso-freaking-terrifying!

    Hope it gets better and better.

  3. Paula H.

    Reading this post has helped me to feel a little better about the very real prospect of returning to work (in a totally different career!) after a ten year absence. I did have to buy new “work shoes” – I hope they are not too pinchy!

    Best of luck adjusting to the new routine – you are not alone.

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