where wildly different is perfectly normal
Game Show House
Game Show House

Game Show House

Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, welcome back to Game Show House, the show where you never know what’s going to happen. Tonight, the game is, once again, “Pick Up the Toys You Want to Keep.” A favorite here on Game Show House. Contestants tonight are A, a five year old boy with a love of reading and all things Lego. Also joining us is J, an almost-two year old boy who loves Bob the Builder and hanging on his mom while she tries to type. In the contestant/emcee/judge role this evening is Mom, an audience favorite. Ready, contestants? Then, let’s go!

Mom: “Alrighty guys, it’s 6:30. At 6:45 we’re going up to get ready for bed. Pick up the toys you want to keep. (Ooh, audience, she used the key words!!) I’m going into the other room to finish reading “Brain, Child“; call me if you need any help.”

A, J: (silence, keep playing)

(Insert cheesy time-passing game show music here)

(You’re all humming the Jeopardy theme, aren’t you?)

(And it’s going to be in your head all night, ain’t it?)

(Please don’t curse me to the heavens or I’ll start talking about It’s a Small World)

Fifteen minutes later…

Mom: “Ok, time for bed. Grab some books and let’s go up.”

A, J: (proceed to run around the house, hiding under tables. At least they’re dressed)

Mom: NOW. (Grabs the kids and chases them up the stairs)

(Now insert cheesy montage-sequence music here, showing kids dressing, brushing, reading, hugs/kisses into bed)

Now the fun part of the game. Mom cleans up the Legos spread over every square inch of the living room, humming a happy little tune. Books get repaired and replaced. Shoes get stashed back in the laundry room. And said Legos get banished to the garage, fate to be determined. Will they be given away? Sold? Set on the curb with a “Free” sign? Or earned back by the boys? Stay tuned to Game Show House, the show where you never know what’s going to happen!

Current score: Mom 2, Boys 0.

Whaddya think?

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