Thank you to everyone who emailed or commented or left me a message on the Facebook page about my continuing search for why am I so damned tired all of the time? answers. Eventually I’ll find some and can move forward, hopefully with more energy. This has been an ongoing issue for at least seven years and probably longer. I’ve worked with MDs and acupuncturists and holistic chiropractors and massage therapists and I still don’t have a definitive answer as to why I’m so consistently tired. Yes, there are issues with adrenal fatigue and hypothyroid and gluten and stress management, but I swear I could handle any of that if I just got consistently good sleep. Can’t remember the last time I woke in the morning refreshed. I’ve started wearing my FitBit at night again to get an idea of my sleep patterns. Last night, by the clock, I slept nearly 7 hours. According to the wee little device it was closer to under 4 hours of actual sleep, the remainder being long stretches of restlessness. That would explain my jaw popping yawns and the fact I passed out watching a Crash Course episode with Andy this morning. This gotta stop.
At least this weekend I had some much needed downtime. Tom took the boys camping, and I was blissfully alone for 43 1/2 hours. And I did nothing. Not.A.Thing. I was forced out of bed before I wanted only because of the dog (who peed and ate and promptly went back to sleep), but the weekend was mine. I binge watched old episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation (and I never, ever, ever binge watch TV….I barely even watch TV). I ate when I was hungry and didn’t care if it was healthy or balanced or appropriate. I ate on the couch. I made martinis. I slept in the middle of the bed with all the pillows. I wore yoga pants and no makeup and laughed at supportive undergarments. I did as little nothing as possible while still breathing. No one talked to me. I played Words With Friends and Bejeweled Blitz and endlessly scrolled through Pinterest. By the time they got back home yesterday I was more rested and relaxed than I had been in awhile (so from a score of maybe -11 to perhaps a score of -8…but more relaxed and rested!). I made time for me.
Good thing, too. Because they hadn’t been home more than a couple hours before Andy took a header down the stairs and broke his wrist.