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Nov 04 2015

My mad NaNoWriMo procrastination skillz

My mad NaNoWriMo procrastination skillzSo we’re well into NaNo now, and while I am making my daily word goals, there will inevitably come a time when ye olde words refuse to come out and play. I don’t have the time these days to sit and bang my head against the desk (plus previous head+desk adventures have left the top cracked and weak), so I’ll have to fall back onto good ole’ procrastination.

Oh, procrastination, how I love/hate thee. I hate the eventual panic of a job delayed, but I love the feeling of “hey, I know I’ll totally get that done, but I have to get this done first!” because that other thing actually gets done. I’ve gone as far as sorting out the different kinds of procrastination, because…you know, procrastination.

Procrasti-cleaning: It’s the month of organize my closet! Scrub the showers until we’re blinded by the shine! Wash the curtains! Clean out that pantry and gosh darn it, go ahead and put down shelf paper! And the kitchen floor is just begging to be scrubbed by hand with a toothbrush! Don’t forget the refrigerator!

Procrasti-cizing: Is it really procrastinating if you’re exercising because of your rapidly expanding ass?

Procrasti-cooking: This is the perfect time to try that new seventy-five step recipe!

Procrasti-planning: Homeschool lesson plans, homeschool class plans for next spring, meal plans, going to eventually paint the master bedroom what color plans, what will I do with my life in seven years when we’re empty nesters plans (wait…only seven years???). Doesn’t matter the area of life, I can and will plan it to avoid something else.

Procrasti-sorting: Now is totally the perfect time to sift through my 20,000+ photos on two different hard drives and organize them and sort them into easily searchable albums and back them up online in several different places! Best time ever!

Procrasti-parenting: Card games with the boys! Making cookies with the boys! Taking the boys to a movie! Helping the boys clean their rooms! Chasing after the boys as they run away from me, unaccustomed to my sudden hands-on parenting! All parenting, all the time, all month long! We only have seven years!

Procrasti-practicing: Can’t find words? Go woodshed your flute music some more, Jen. You have a concert in a few weeks and you have parts more exposed than a nip slip. Screw those up and the whole world will know.

Procrasti-blogging: Dig out the list of blog post ideas you’ve had in Trello for the last year! Pick one and just start writing. It is writing, after all…and it may or may not be what you’re reading right now!

Procrasti-sleeping: No. Just no. When you have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Seasonal Affective Depression, sleeping isn’t procrastination, it’s what you do to not kill the people around you.

Procrasti-panicking: Oh, we all know this one! Sudden realization that the deadline doth approacheth. Tea must be brewed, appropriate music must be found, yoga pants must be donned, fingernails must be trimmed, earplugs must be acquired, dog must be let out, children must be duct-taped to non-movable surfaces. More than likely, it’s far past sleepy time and you’re screwed. Shouldn’t have waited so long.

Mad procrastination skillz. I haz dem.

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