There’s a meme meandering around Facebook where you are given a number and that’s how many unknown items you are to share about yourself. I’ve put it off for several days because really, I’ve had a blog for just shy of eight years, what the hell is left that I haven’t already shared? At this point it’s toejam descriptions and the combination to my bike lock. I also wasn’t sure if I was supposed to change my profile picture to a platypus, a rainbow zebra, or just the standard Facebook meme giraffe; that wasn’t clear so I just left it.
And then I thought, “Self! You’re doing NaBloPoMo! And you could use a lighthearted and amusing post today! And this is the kind of fun meme post that bloggers did all the freaking time before Facebook kidnapped the social and community aspect of blogging! Surely there are six things you have never shared on your blog! Surely you could milk the hell outta this meme for a post! Self! Get on it already!”
So I listened to myself. If any of these sound familiar, I apologize; I have shit for brains lately and my memory ain’t all that great either.
1. My name was supposed to be Jillian. When my mom woke from the anesthesia, she discovered she had a Jennifer. My dad had named me after a girl in one of his grad classes because he liked the name. Yes, mom let him live and yes, they are still married, 47 years and counting. Me? I’ve had the pleasure of using every possible shortening of the name short of Jenna, courtesy of Jennifer being the number one name in the country for the entire first decade of my life.
2. For about half a heartbeat at decision time, I was going to play horn instead of flute. Let us take a moment and consider all the ways my life would be different had I chosen that instrument.
I really have been writing for too long. I keep thinking of possibilities and then realizing I’ve pontificated on that in the past.
3. My original college major was special ed, with a focus on deaf education. I changed majors on preview weekend, playing for the director of bands in his office when he had a minute. Met the flute professor at my first lesson. When I auditioned for grad school, I couldn’t go out on any of the official dates because I was working 900 miles away. We flew out on a long weekend and I played for the flute professor in her office when she had a minute. So I have really no idea how true college auditions work.
4. We built our house in Colorado and I have an entire scrapbook of the process, from bare ground through our first year living there. What I don’t have is a picture of is the JM ❤️ TM scrawled on one of the wood beams behind the drywall in our old bedroom.
Sweetbabyjesusonapony really? I only have four? I’m dyin’ here!
5. Facebook tells me I have 440 friends (holy crap, really?). I would say, of that number, the vast majority are not local. Part of that is because we picked up and moved a thousand miles two years ago, but a good portion is because I have met so many wonderful people through blogging and gifted advocacy. In fact, two of those friends (met both through my blog, in the old-timey era of several years ago) came to visit and stay in my house before we’d ever met face to face. The whole “stranger danger” and “people you meet on the internet” conversations are all kinds of fun in this house.
6. I am the hugest social introvert you will ever meet in the history of ever. I have no problem speaking in public (I even enjoy it), can play my flute in a recital without a second thought, and love being in groups of people whose company I enjoy. But when it’s over I need to get the hell outta dodge and get as alone as possible to recover. In addition, I am considerably more outgoing and loquacious in print than in person, so please remember that if we ever meet. I’m reserved until I know you well, then I let the
profanity fart jokes fly.
7. I have a potty mouth.
8. I don’t watch TV. Or, rather, I watch so little as to not be able to participate in conversations about the show du jour; social media has saved me in that at least I know what people are talking about. However, I can quote whole segments of Family Guy, American Dad, and Bob’s Burgers. See also #7.
9. I have a remarkably low bullshit tolerance for someone who is also very much “live and let live.” My baseline level of stress is probably related to this.
10. I can’t count worth a damn.