where wildly different is perfectly normal
IKEA is taunting me
IKEA is taunting me

IKEA is taunting me

I love IKEA. Some people call it cheap furniture, I call it “stuff I can afford to buy AND also afford to replace once the boys beat the shit out of it.” Walking into a store makes me happy. A place for everything and everything in its place. Form and function skip down the lane and stop to play tonsil hockey every few blocks. Clean lines and storage that makes me pant. Tom calls the catalog “Jen Porn.” It comes in the mail and and just forget about seeing me for the rest of the day. I’m in seclusion, with a bottle glass of wine and my catalog. I may or may not whisper sweet nothings to it as I mark up the pages with a pen and drool.

Denver does not have an IKEA store. Any items I have, I bought in Chicago and dragged back here. I do love them, but I love the experience even more. Free childcare. Yummy food. Clean couches. We were promised an IKEA store about a year and a half ago, and it will likely be 2012 before it’s open. It’s killing me. So when I saw this ad on my iPhone, I wanted to cry/rant/drive to Chicago:

Really? An IKEA sale ad for a Denver news station? Twist the knife, why don’t ya? I’d love to save 20-60% at The IKEA Sale! LOVE, I tell ya. Sigh…two more years. And, despite the fact that I abhor crowds more than words can express, I will be at opening day. And probably with a bunch of friends.

Oh, and Trader Joe’s? You’re welcome to come to Denver at any time now. I want my Two Buck Chuck.


  1. Karen

    IKEA is taunting me too! I live not too far from the supposed site for the Colorado store and have yet to see any sign that an IKEA store is being built there. Last I heard, they were getting all the necessary permits…

  2. I was at the Dallas one when it opened a few years ago. There is no replacement and even though I get annoyed at how it is a complete maze and the check out takes approximately 2.4 years I go because there is cool cheap stuff.

  3. I think you should just make the pilgrimage here, and hang out with me for a weekend. I love IKEA!! And, I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but we have TWO now!!! They opened on in Bolingbrook a couple of years ago. That’s less than a 30 minute drive from my house. 🙂 Just puttin’ it out there…. 😉

  4. MoCo Mom

    You’re so funny, and this is so me. Or was, when my kids were still short enough to go to the ball room. I miss the ball room! Now I go for the marketplace, meatballs for lunch, and for the endless parade of lamps needed for my son’s room (I’m not sure what he does to them, but they keep burning out, breaking, or ending up in other parts of the house). I need a few things….maybe it’s time for a visit. And Trader Joe’s? The best invention on the face of the earth. Sadly, the ones in MoCo don’t carry wine tho 🙁 .

Whaddya think?

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