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Nothing says LOVE like a large, unexpectedly expensive home repair
Nothing says LOVE like a large, unexpectedly expensive home repair

Nothing says LOVE like a large, unexpectedly expensive home repair

Hi Murphy! Hi Law sidekick! We haven’t missed you! We didn’t write; didn’t want you to return! But.Here.You.Are.

Yesterday was our 14th anniversary. A day to renew our love for each other, to remember how we met and fell in love and married. A day to discover that Murphy and his little Law don’t give a rat’s patootie about any of that. Good thing we didn’t get each other gifts. Good thing I did get flowers. Just sayin’.

Our HVAC system has been making…hmmm, how to describe?…sounds like a dachshund giving birth to a woolly mammoth inside a washing machine during the spin cycle in the middle of an EF5 tornado. Loud. Banging. Whining. Unpleasant to the ear, is what I’m going for here. Wouldn’t have been that big of a deal, but before today’s temps of mid-50s, we were in a stretch of mid-90 degree temperatures and the a/c was on quite a bit. And my office is in the basement, mere feet from the HVAC system. And my job requires me to be on the phone a lot. Sooo…local HVAC repair guys to the rescue!

Yesterday, our 14th anniversary, we learned that the HVAC motor needed replaced and part + labor = Big Number Thank God We Didn’t Have Elaborate Plans For Our Anniversary.

Today, one day into our fifteenth year of marital bliss, we learned that when we finished the basement four years ago, the door to the furnace room was designed to code, yet covered six inches too much of the HVAC cover and the large motor thingamabob wouldn’t.fit.into.the.unit. The wall was in the way. Code declares in no uncertain terms that any walls or doors must be far enough away for the entire unit to be replaced, but doesn’t specify a distance for repair.

We learned this at noon. I got rather dizzy. Sadly, wine was not the culprit in this dizziness.

So, today, one day into our fifteenth year of marital bliss we learned that HVAC part + labor + return labor to install part when wall issue is resolved + demolition of wall + new, wider doors to allow for HVAC clearance + wall demolition/door installation labor = Jen is on her third glass of wine and thank the sweet baby zombie Jesus she stocked up on Trader Joe’s Three Buck Chuck because she needs the wine and the booze budget is probably gonna be happy-go-bye-bye and sayonara to the laminate floors they were gonna get ’cause the seven year old builder-grade crap carpeting is threadbare and toodleloo to any thoughts of a vacation in the next 18 months and the MomVan only has 100,000+ miles on it and holy crap I’m so glad I found a job.

My motto for today, and life in general: “If this is the worst thing that happens to me today, I’m in pretty good shape.” I say this because Tom and I are really and truly laughing at this. It very quickly went from “hey, the HVAC is making a funky sound” to “too bad ramen isn’t gluten-free.” I also say this today because in the grand scheme of things, this is minor. Right now, as I type, my cousin is in labor with twins. She and her partner have been through hell and back with her pregnancy. Ch not only had to deal with the crap that pregnancy brings, but also something else. The doctors thought it was lymphoma, then not. They still have no idea, but she’s bringing a couple of preemies into the world because her body had just had enough. She and C are going to be wonderful moms and I’m so happy for them. A large unexpected home repair is nothing compared to preemies coming into the world and my cousin so ill. Nothing.

So I laugh at the chaos my life brings and give thanks that I’m able to find the humor in it all. Because, really, it’s all small stuff.

Even when it’s big.


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  2. Oy… Sounds like a nightmare, but I’m glad you’re able to find (and hopefully keep) some perspective about it all. No chance homeowners insurance will cover some of it?

    Best wishes to your cousin and her partner. I’ll be holding all four of them close in my heart.

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  3. Ugh. So sorry. Just miserable.

    Let me cheer you up: The mean girl I knew was on Toddlers and Tiaras last night. Train wreck.

    As for your cousin…feel free to pass on my name if she needs any NICU info. My SIL had her son at 29 weeks, and you know that Joel has his brief stint as well.

  4. Woah! You’ve got more than a serving size of Big Bucks for Bad Boys going on! Hope you get it settled with a modicum of pain.
    As to having preemies, that’s huge. I wish your cousin all the best. If she’d like to connect with other parents of preemies, she might want to visit the March of Dimes community called Share Your Story: http://www.shareyourstory.org/ Many parents find it enormously supportive and helpful.

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