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Feb 17 2010

Second verse, same as the first

Still here, haven’t been dragged off for shooting Princess the PMSing Laptop in a momentary lapse of judgment (note: not only do I not have access to a firearm, I’ve never fired one). She’s still not working worth crap, and I made the executive decision this morning that I’m giving her up for Lent. Yes, I’m fully aware that today is Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent and already I’ve fallen off the Lent Wagon, but since she’s moving so slow I suppose I will too. Bitch ain’t gonna see Easter, that’s for sure.

It is all kinds of February around here, and it’s not just me. Tom made a comment at lunch about “back in February,” and I had the sad task of reminding him that it is still that horrid month, and we have 13 days to go before we see any relief. The days rush by so fast I can’t catch my breath; I climb into bed every night wondering where the day went. AND YET the month is dragging on. Sad state of affairs, that. This morning someone greeted me with the standard, “How ya doing?” and all I could do was look at him and reply, “It’s February.” When you start the day off by convincing your test-phobic twice-exceptional 3rd grader that state testing isn’t going to kill him (yes, CSAPs started today whheeeeee), it’s pretty much just downhill from there.

February is my “always darkest before dawn” month, where things get worse and darker before things suddenly improve and it’s all fairies and unicorns farting glitter and working computers. Yes, I put a functioning computer in the same category as glitter-farting unicorns–do you blame me? I made an offhand remark on Facebook about wanting to run away and I think there were no fewer than a dozen women who were ready to toss everything and head out with me. I don’t think that’s so much a statement of my coolness as it is the recognition that this month sucks and a little warmth, sun, and unlimited drinks by scantily clad pool boys is precisely the cure for such a predicament. I’m actually considering assembling a little vacay for Suckage Month 2011, women only. I think four days on a cruise ship with no way of being contacted, food and drinks a’flowing, nothing to do but what we wanted to do, would do wonders for our combined mental states. I can dream.

So yet again, a bleh post because February is in cahoots with Princess and sucking my will to live. But soon March will be here, with a functioning computer and unicorns, and life will be good again.

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  1. MoCo Mom

    February in DC generally doesn’t suck too much. Days are getting longer. There may be snow, but it’s a novelty and fun. You know that spring and cherry blossoms are just around the corner. But: in the past week-and-a-half I’ve had a car accident, dug out of two blizzards, dealt with the kids’ being off school for 6 days due to said snow, and been laid off. Or shall I say, been confirmed that I will be laid off but right now they really really need me to finish a report first but then bye bye. Aside from the accident, I knew the rest was coming yet it still sucks.

    So, deep breath. I’ll be the first to sign up for the cruise. (An excellent idea). On a parallel note I spent the afternoon looking for ways to use my airline miles and my minimal ‘pin’ money savings acct. to go get lost somewhere. No luck so far, but I’ll keep you posted.

    P.S. Congrats on the decision to boot the Princess. It would be SO worth going into debt to get a cheap new laptop, OR the wished-for Apple of your eye, to save you the hassle and lost productivity (not to mention stress) of the Princess.

  2. Karen

    I think we’re all feeling the February blahs — even without a broken computer. Hang in there….

  3. ChiTown Girl

    I’m so there next year!! I get a long weekend every Feb. for Lincoln’s Bday/Presidents’ Day, so if you can plan it for that weekend, it would be great! I’m totally serious!

    I think I told you my computer, Princess the 2nd, is on her way out, too. NOW the bitch caught an STD, or a computer virus, whatever! All I know is, she’s GOT TO GO!! I totally got scammed, all I keep getting is some crappy ass screen that tells me I have to download some kind of virus protection (which I now know IS the actual virus) and I finally just filled out the damn form and put my credit card number in, only to almost immediately get a call from the fraud protection division of my credit card company. God bless them for being on the ball!! Now, not only do I have a computer that doesn’t work, I also have no freakin’ credit card since they closed the account, and the new one hasn’t come yet!!! ARGH! 🙁

  4. Deborah

    ROFL…you rock, Jen.

  5. Dawn on MDI

    It occurs to me that I’d really like to go on that vacation cruise next year… um. but then my motives might not be the same as everyone else’s…

  6. Theresa

    And I was one of the women ready to join you! I HATE February! I need sunshine and warmth and fresh air!

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