Or maybe I need to be committed.
Last night I realized just why I feel so bad, and why, when I look in the mirror, I am surprised to see such a tired and stressed out visage. I made a list of everything I have on my plate right now and it was ridonkulous.
*Finishing edits on the book.
*Preparing A for his first sleepaway camp, which entails buying 25%+ DEET bug spray because the mosquitos at Scout camp can carry you off. And more jeans. And mosquito netting. And this and that and good God is it time for him to go already?
*Started up my flute studio again, which includes learning a new studio management software. And advertising myself. And finding new students. And, oh yeah, teaching those students.
*Started up the home-based business I regretfully quit in 2009, which includes learning a new business management software, as well as relearning everything I forgot in the last 2 1/2 years. Oh, and starting over in a new state, with almost no clients. Right now Lisa is my BFF for hosting a party.
*Painting every last square inch of the house, including the bathroom vanities and very likely the kitchen cabinets (Rust-Oleum, I love you). Of course, it’s not as easy as just slapping up some paint, nonono! The walls all need cleaning and repair (some need a lot of repair), as well repairing and/or replacing anything in a particular room that is particularly frakked up. This all means my house is
a raging fustercluck of a mess in continual disarray.
*Playing in the community’s summer concert band. Piccolo. Which is awesome, but you can’t screw up when you’re the piccolo player; you’re the only one, and no one can miss the
shrieking squawks drowning out the ensemble sweet dulcet tones floating over the other musicians.
*Agreeing to additional writing opportunities that have urgent deadlines, in addition to the ones I already have.
*Attempting to revamp this website to make it a little more user friendly and easier on the eyes.
*Planning the new homeschool year, as well as planning for a few summer homeschooling unit studies.
*This is all, of course, on TOP of the day to day plate spinning at which I so excel (snort).
There was more but my head blew clean off several bullet points ago.
Dear Jen: WHAT THE HELL? Love, Jen
This would explain why I crawl into bed at night wondering what happened to the day, and why I haul myself out of bed in the morning pissier than a wet cat on a stick. Can I drop anything? Nope. Put anything off? Well, haven’t been posting here much lately, have I? So, yeah, I’ve really done it this time. I’ve really and truly, without a doubt, overcommitted the hell outta myself.
So once I get past this unholy hurdle of all that crap above, I solemnly swear I will never do this to myself again. It is taking a miserable toll on my mind, body, and soul.