Last updated on April 12, 2020
Thank God It’s Election Day.
I can plug my phone back in, unmute the telly, and quit building bonfires with the political fliers that come in the mail. I’m out of marshmallows and didn’t want to go get more. It’s hell being an unaffiliated voter; both sides drive you batshit crazy. Yes, unaffiliated, even though I lean so far left I limp. Have lifts in my shoes so you can’t tell though.
It’s Election Day! Hooray!
Today is a first for me. I will vote in grubby workout clothes, as my voting place is at the rec center. I will make my mark then waddle on up to the track/weight room, where I will celebrate my freedom. Freedom to vote, freedom to walk around without a male escort, freedom to freak the hell out of every person in the room with my choice of workout clothes. Freedom takes many forms, my friends.
I’m looking forward to sitting down tonight and watching the results come in. I’ve watched election night results for as long as I can remember, since high school, if not before. Politics fascinates me. It also horrifies me, stuns me, amuses me, and embarrasses me. Better than any scripted “reality” show. The VP debate in 2008 (Biden/Palen) will go down in my own personal history, as I don’t remember much of it. I was on my scrapbooking retreat with my girlfriends then and we played a little drinking game while watching it. Learn from me, my children: never play a debate drinking game on a “I only had a taco salad for dinner” stomach. Ever. Nothing nearly as exciting happened this go-round.
So, I’ll say it as I do nearly every election cycle. Go vote. If you don’t bother to vote, STFU. If you are privileged enough to live in a country where you have the right to vote, you’d better take advantage of it. Too many people gave their lives for you to have that right. Too many people in other countries are still giving their lives to have that right. Yes, it’s like your mom telling you to eat your Brussels sprouts because kids in <insert third world country here> are starving. Oh, and do it because it’s the right thing to do. Shut up and vote. You don’t have to vote like me, or your spouse, or your neighbor. Just.Vote.
And then take those last few political fliers and make the season’s final s’more. Gooey political goodness…mmm…