where wildly different is perfectly normal
The Big Four-6
The Big Four-6

The Big Four-6

Doo Doo Doo Doo Doo Doooo they say it’s your birthday….

It is indeed my birthday. 46. A number I’m happy to have reached with my faculties nearly intact, with both parents still living and happily married to each other, with family around me that I love. A number I am comfortable with. I acknowledge my age but know I don’t always have to act it. In fact, if I actually acted my age I’m pretty certain I’d be miserable; it’s best for everyone that I continue to channel my inner 12 year old boy.

So I’m 46, and in a reasonably good place in life. Married, two awesome sons, a neurotic cat. House, two cars. Stable family life. Finally employed. Bravely fighting the squirrels that conspire to keep me from focusing. I’m mostly happy.

And yet.

Yesterday I weighed in at the highest I’ve ever been in my life, a good 50 or so pounds heavier than my newly renewed drivers license claims. All the weight I lost a year or so ago missed me, and returned with some friends.
My hair…I thought I’d just let it go and embrace my inner DON’T GIVE A FLONK with a wise old crone mop, and instead it just looks like crap. I finally cracked and made an appointment, so next week I’m getting a good deal of it chopped off and styled. Not the pixie short style of years past that I loved, but a little shorter and hella more attractive.
Decided to start a “selfie-of-the-day-age-46” project this morning, so that at the end of the year I can see the small progressive changes as they go. Speaking of progressive, pretty sure I need new lenses because my eyes are getting worse but I’m just not up to getting a second eye exam this year.
I’m overall fairly healthy, but I gotta stay on top of my energy levels; determined that after last week and how I could feel myself dipping into my energy reserves just to get through the days.
I get things done throughout the day, but I never feel like I get any closer to my goals. Is it because I keep adding goals or because I just don’t work hard enough or smart enough?

Many people of my…vintage…take on a goal of sorts. I’ve noticed that it usually involves running. People, if you see me running, you can be sure there’s a reason, and it does not involve recreation. So instead I’m setting a different goal for myself. In four years, on the big 5-0, I intend to do this:

Which will be quite interesting, because these days I’m more like this:

It’s a Monday everywhere. Here?

Today I am 46. Cheers to another spin around that nuclear reaction in the sky.


  1. I love this post, Jen. Just for a little perspective. I’m the big Six-7. Hard to believe, I know. Hard for me to believe. Four-6 sounds oh so very young!! (I had just started my counseling career at 41…no blog, no books until my 60s) So, give yourself time to enjoy your age and take great care of your body-mind-heart. You will be glad you did, 20+ years hence. And know that it’s possible to discover new and even better creative pathways well into your more geezer-ish years. Happy birthday sweetie pie!

    1. jenm

      Thanks, Paula! <3 I keep reminding myself of those things, that great success can and does come to women "of a certain age." ;) And yes, I know I need to take better care of my body, and I want to. Making the time, juggling that with the other things in my life...blerg.

  2. “People, if you see me running, you can be sure there’s a reason, and it does not involve recreation. ”

    PREACH! I have a similar saying, at 43; “I don’t run unless I’m being chased.”

    Happy birthday!!

Whaddya think?

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.